OK- I really like this site- just found it around 5 am this morning- love it love it!
here goes my situation. My daughter recently graduated HS and quickly moved in with her bf, his mother and stepdad- fine. Although I didn't want her moving out so quickly, I understood her need for her independence. I told her she's always welcome to come back home, and she does come by a few nights a week and spends time with us- great.
She called me up a few weeks ago and spilled her guts about the situation she's in that I was unaware of- her bf's mother is bi-polar, has ADD, and takes her adderal too much and she stays up all day and night, days at a time- she leaves the house around midnight and doesn't return until 5 am after going "dumpster diving". She and her husband fight daily. My daughter is the only one working in that house, her bf has excuse after excuse as to why he can't work (stomach problems, foot problems, knee problems, back problems) he's 19 btw- and hasn't held a job past 5 days since he's graduated HS last year.
The mother follows my daughter around the house, calls her a flake, and the fighting keeps my daughter up all night- and she has to work.
When my daughter was in tears telling me this story, I immediately told her to come back home, and if she wanted to date him- I worry about her, I worry about the mother or what she's capable of, (the mother cooked for them once and it landed them all in the hospital for food poisoning).. doubt it was an accident. The mother takes her husband's anti-seizure medication, even though she doesn't have seizures.. she's messed up!
My daughter declined moving back home, she wants to be with her bf- and I don't have room for him- plus I don't want an umemployed bum hanging around my house all day. She then called a couple nights later, another "incident" occured and this time the cops were called, apparantely the mom was waving around a knife ... she had a court date, etc., my daughter says things haven't improved and the mother is messed up as ever.
Well- I feel torn.. I offered for my daughter to move back home, and when she was here the other day I was quite upset over the situation and told my daughter that her bf needs to get a job and get her out of that house if he really cares.. now she's mad at me-
Did I say the wrong thing?